in A NEW DAWN Part 1

Narrator: It’s the year 2005 and heh heh heh just kidding… In the year 21XX six months after the shocking events in “Year of the Fox” the X-Force finally completed construction of their new city on the moon. After a long mission in Africa the team crashes at Ben’s Dojo.

Ben: Oy what a day we’ve spent 18 hours in New Sudan and even my titanium innards hurt.

Rick: Taking on and entire an entire army, destroying mines and deposing of a dictator… I’d say so…

Ben: Who asked you? (Turns on the holovid)

Jerry: Welcome to the Jerry Springer Show today it’s….

Alon: Who watches this crap?

Rob: (Thumbs through the Holo-Guide) umm… Nothing really interesting is on just stupid reruns, damn mid-season.

X-Force: (groan)

Ben: Ugh… (Punches in some random number)

Announcer: News Update… on CNN

X-Force: BEN!

Ben: What?

Andrew: You know very damn well we hate the news with a passion.

Ben: Shut up newbie! Do you want to be roast Peacock?

Andrew: (Silent)

Trevor: ((Quiet! I’m trying to watch!))

Reporter: I’m Gale Rogers reporting from Capital City. Peace has finally been restored to the New Sudan region. Death and despair are everywhere are there in the aftermath the X-Force’s unauthorized mission that has taken 150 000 lives and left many Islamic Sudanese homeless.  Our correspondent in New Sudan Dale Potter has more on the crisis. Dale?

Dale: Orphaned babies litter the streets in the capital region as the X-Force ravaged New Sudan. American and Canadian industrial complexes are ablaze the damage estimate in the billions it’s highly unlikely that these companies are going to invest this region again.

Sudanese Woman: (Speaks a language unknown to the X-Force)

Translator: I saw the demons over there. (Old woman points) they were taunting and beating our leader Mohamed. They have destroyed everything our armies powerless and crushed. Oh lord what have we done to deserve this? Why?

Dale: As you can see Gale the situation as turned from bad to worse. First some parts of Africa were wiped out by the fall of Eurasia now a superteam of those we once adored has now gone bad. I’m Dale Potter, New Sudan.

Gale: As most of you know much of mainland Europe and the Middle East as well as parts Asia and Africa we destroyed by Eurasia’s fall and all what’s left is ocean. A grim reminder of the suffering as we speak President George W. Bush is to address the nation we bring you this on CNN.

President Bush: My follow Americans, today we have seen the one of the worst attacks on humanity since Sigma’s last onslaught…

Ben: Hey! He said a big word I’m impressed…

X-Force: (laugh)

President Bush: …now the X-Force once those we considered at one time, heroes. Have gone and interfered in our affairs. I am calling for this action to cease these brash and unappreciated….

Rob: And I thought the National Enquirer made up like this. Turn it off Ben.

Ben: No argument there… (Turns off the TV)

Gary: If Tim got word of this you’d guys would get a…

Ben: Please spare us I never really liked that Boy Scout anyway.

Gary: Yeah he’s a pain in the… 

(A Raichu jumps on Gary’s lap)

Gary: ARGGGGGGGGH! Get it off! Get it off!

Ben: Relax. Sparky would never…

Sparky: RAI!(Electrocutes Gary)

Gary: Yeowwwwwwwww!

Ben: On the other hand….

Rick: Did you really have to let him out of the Pokeball?

Alon: It gets annoying that I have to watch my step all the time… (Lifts foot)

Ben: Wha? (Finds his other Raichu in the treads) JOLTY! (Pulls Jolty out of the tread)

Alon: Will you tell him to watch where he’s walking… (!!!) What are you doing with that Pokeball?

Ben: Go Lavy! 

(Pokeball hit Alon in the head)

Alon: Oof!

Andrew: Cripes… he’s going to do it again.

(Quilava comes out of the Pokeball)

Lavy: LAAAAV! (Uses Flamethrower on Alon)

Alon: (Screams) I need WATER! (Runs out)

Rob: Wowza! That was harsh.

Andrew: Hey what happened to my Snorlax?

Trevor: ((It’s up on the hill taking a perpetual nap as always. Newbie.))

Andrew: Aw… shut up. Hey look!

Trevor: ((It’s the communicator… who is it?))

Gary: It’s that idiot Bush. Do you want to take it Ben?

Ben: No, I’m in no mood for taking criticism… If you excuse I have to get ready for Jerry Springer…

X-Force: What?

(A day later behind the set)

Rob: You never told us that you married Iris…

Ben: We separated a year ago and she has custody of our son…

Andrew: Son? You have a…?

Ben: Will you zip it?!? We married out of wedlock because of Chibi, I can’t say we had a good one but I grew attached to the brat.

Rick: So where is he?

Alon: Remember Iris saying we was watching a production of the Teletubbies, because she thought Spring would be to intense for him…

Trevor: ((Who ever would watch the dribble is beyond me.))

Producer: Hey Dragoon! You’re on!

Jerry: Here is Magma Dragoon folks!

Ben you and  you!

Gary: Heh you can never get enough of that  word.

Rob: (Brings out the Stun Gun)

Gary: Mommy…

(Meanwhile on the set)

Jerry: Do you know why you’re here Ben?

Ben: Because Iris wants to divorce me and is becoming a lesbian?

Jerry: What the?!? That was supposed to be a…

Ben: Come on! I knew she was making out with her lesbian lover since we separated. Personally I hated the little  since our wedding day.

(In the Teletubbies studio)

Teletubbies: (Play and laugh like idiots)

Chibi: This sucks! I’m going to Jerry Springer. (Walks through the connecting door)

Rob: What a bad way to end a marriage… Your wife being a lesbian and…

Andrew: Shut up! He’s about to sign…

Chibi: Why that little ! I’m gonna kill her!

X-Force: (!!!)

Rob: Why it’s… Chibi.

Gary: He’s such a cute… (Chibi bites his fingers and clamps) Yeoooooooooow! (Runs onto the set) Get it off! Get it off!

Jerry: (sighs)

Ben: Chibi? Get your teeth off that fungus!

Chibi: Let’s go…

Iris: Honey you’re supposed to be…

Chibi: Shut up ! I gonna kill you! (Whacks her with a chair)

Iris: Ow! Stop it… TWAP! You little brat! TWAP! Or I’ll…

Ben: Do nothing! (Puts a muzzle on Chibi MD)

(Storm Owl bursts in)

Marc: Ben! I’ve come back…

Ben and Gary:…

(Meanwhile outside the Teletubbies stage)

Izzy: Wait a minute! I just want to do something…

Alex: (Sighs) Make it quick shorty… We have work to do…

Izzy: (Opens the door)

Kid 1: Look it’s a giant bug!

Kid 2: Maybe he’ll give us candy…

Izzy: Suck on this you little brats…

(Jerry Springer Show)

Ben: So you’re telling us that you ran from the gates of hell? 

Marc: That’s the one and the Grim Reaper’s following me.

Grim Reaper: Where’s the one you call Marc?

Gary: He’s over there. (points to Jerry Springer)

Jerry: Wha? (Grim Reaper hacks him to bits) 

Grim Reaper: Wait a minute Lucifer told me he was a reploid you deceived me…

Gary: What can I say? It’s a gift.

Grim Reaper: Oy! I’ll contend with you later I have business next door… a crowd of kids is being slaughtered as we speak… (Disappears in a cloud of smoke)

Ben: Crap… Gary? Marc?

Gary: Yeah?

Marc: What do you need?

Ben: Get Chibi MD out of here right now… I have some last minute business to attend to.

(Meanwhile on the Teletubbies stage) 

Izzy: DIE YOU LITTLE SCUMBAGS! 

(Children scream as they get vaporized)

Izzy: Heh, I always wanted to use my enhanced powers on children. Their screams are the most satisfying…

Alex: Oh crap! I got word that the X-Force is on the move… prepare for interception…

(Meanwhile down the halls of the Television Studios Marc and Gary run quickly to get outside)

Marc: So how do you suggest we get out of here?

Gary: Once we’re outside we can open a teleporter door to X-Force City…

Marc: What happened to the Sky Lagoon…

Gary: (Pushes the lobby door open) It’s a long… (Gets snared)

Marc: (!!!)

Alex: Pop quiz @$$hole! Guess who I am…

Marc: I’ve heard of you… You’re Axel the Red aren’t you?

Alex: I once went by that name but that was a long time ago. I go by Alex these days.

Steve: (Lands on the street) we have been sent by our master to destroy you and the rest of your pathetic team…

Gerry: (Drills above street level) so surrender now and the Anti X-Force will go easy on you and give you a quick and painless death…

Gary: (Laughs)

Gerry: What’s so funny you little turd?

Gary: I just sent a priority alarm to the remaining members of my team and told them everything you said…

Izzy: Shut up! I’m going to beat your young ass into…

Rob: (Crashes through the tenth floor window) Dibs on the @$$hole with the drill!

Gerry: Who are you calling an @$$hole?

Andrew: (Crashes through another window) Oh sorry… (Slams Izzy with a high-powered plasma stream) is  more appropriate?

Alon: (Lands on the street shaking the ground) no maybe Horse  Mother  son of a  is more like it.

Gary: Holy  on a  if we swear anymore the audience won’t understand a word will we say.

Trevor: ((Gary, if you don’t shut up now. We’ll all be killed!)) (Fires a barrage of missiles)

(Jerry Springer Set)

Ben: And this… TWAP! Is for… TWAP! The…

Rick: Ben! I’ve received a priority transmission from Gary! We’re… (Building shakes) under attack!

Ben: Then let’s join the fray!

(Outside)

Izzy: (Punches Andrew in the jaw) Ya’ know I’ve always hated young punks like you?

Andrew: (Tries to take a shot at Izzy but fails)

Izzy: Bah! No experience, no skill I wonder why Sigma drafted you into his armies…

(Izzy keeps beating Andrew into a coma until)

Rob: (Releases Gerry from his headlock) No! (Pounces on top of Izzy) You old son of a worthless little ! I’ll kill you… (Pummels Izzy) KILL YOU! (Get thrown into a fire hydrant) ARGH!

Ben: That was a mistake you commie bastard…

Gerry: Wha?

Ben: HYPER FLAMETHROWER ATTACK!

(Attack knocks Gerry through a series of skyscrapers)

Ben: You dare assault my team? (Flies over Gerry’s location) I’ll make sure you won’t again! (Destroys an entire block where the debris buries Gerry) To make sure that won’t happen again… (Flames the concrete and glass to create a tomb)

(Meanwhile the biological terrors Gary and Alex face off against each other)

Gary: You’re a skilled fighter (hits an Alex double with Ice Vision).

Alex: And you’re not bad for someone who was an Eskimo. (Uses his vine whip)

Gary: If you really aspire to be like me (throws a pie in Alex’s face) maybe you should apply for Clown College… I hear they’re accepting applicants right now.

Alex: I’ve heard of you’re legendary insolence… (Looks around) where are you…

Gary: (Whistles) Over here… you know what do you Rob.

Rob: Yep… (Slices open the fire hydrant cap) time to water the flowers.

Alex: (Gets hit by the stream of water) ARGH!

Rob: (Gives Gary the high five) Whoo-hoo… We rock!

Gary: Here’s your reward for being a nice kitty… (Throws a ball of yarn into the street)

Rob: YARN! (Pounces on it and gets run over by a van)

Gary: Ouchies now that’s pain…

???: I’ll show you pain fungus…

Rick: Gary! Look out!

Alvin: (Wraps his tentacles around Gary) Prepare to perish heh heh heh I love to hear the screams of my prey… (Electrocutes Gary)

Gary: (Screams)

Alon: Pop quiz @$$hole! What’s your weakness…?

Alvin: Why that’s… (Realizes the ice barrier hurtling towards him.) Mommy…

(KRASH!)

Alvin: Owieowieowieowie…

(TWIP!)

(Rick’s webbing hits Alvin)

Rick: You don’t know the real meaning of pain! (Hurtles Alvin into another building and slams him into the ground)

Alon: Excellente! (Notices something) Wha?
  
Matt: Hey Spider! Swing your way out of this! (Uses Hyper Flamethrower Attack on Rick)

Rick: Argh! (Falls to the side walk)

Matt: You’re next… (Gets slammed into the ground)

Ben: … Not if I can help it you reject from Jurrasic Park. What happened? The raptors stole your spotlight?

Matt: This coming from an animaloid that shouldn’t exist…

Ben: At least I have a brain that’s bigger than the size of a pea… If you want me Rex, you’ll have to catch me… (Flies up into the upper atmosphere)

Matt: (Follows)

Duff: ARRRRRR! There be the landlubber what do you have to say for yourself mate?

Alon: Hey Moby Dick! Is Captian Ahab still chasing ya’ ?

Duff: ARRRRRR! Thy be an insolent welp! Let me show you a little respect…

(Meanwhile Ben and Matt reach Earth Orbit where Ben executes his plan)

Ben: ((He’s well enough behind me to not to notice my plans)) (Turns around to ram Matt) ((We both should be able to survive re-entry into Earth’s atmosphere however for Mattie Boy the impact will be another story))

Matt: ((What the ? He’s turning around… Uh oh.))

(Ben rams Matt and the two re-enter the atmosphere at mind-bending speeds. Meanwhile in the air.)

Darren: Squeak! I’ll suck the energy clean out of you…

Trevor: ((Only if you catch me you flying rat!))

Marc: So Steve we meet again. Are you still leaking oil in your armor…?

Steve: How dare you insult a former head of the Reploid Air Force!

Marc: I’ve been there you’re nothing more than a welp with high rank! Wing Missile!

Steve: (Dodges) you know I’m naturally faster than…

Marc:  INCOMING!

(KABOOM!)

Darren: Cripes! It’s Matt!

Gerry: (Breaks free of his prison) Wha?

Alon: Face it McWhalen you’re out of your element…

Duff: That be true! But I can adapt… (Knocks Alon off him)

Alon: Oof!

Duff: Ahoy me mates! Time to retreat!

Steve: As it had been said before… “It’s better to flee to fight another day”

(The Anti X-Force dissappears)

Ben: (Lands) sorry guys but I had to fly around the world a couple times to lose momentum. Where’s the Anti X-Force?

Alon: They vanished but that’s the least of our worries.

Chibi: Daddy! (Runs up and hugs him) what were those men doing?

Ben: They were a bunch of  who want to kill us as usual.

Trevor: ((Only this time they nearly succeeded…))

Marc: What do we do now Ben?

Ben: Get everyone up to the ER at X-Force City… DOOR! X-Force City ER…

(With that the X-Force take their injured and leave for the moon)  

To Be Contiued...